Marriage

Been married for only 7 months, but oh boyz I can already feel the difference between the two phases (Single / Married). I always thought how different can being married be, how tough can it be to handle in-laws - I'm so so so wrong.

Marriage is between 2 person but once u're lawfully married, you have tons of responsibilities and duties piling on top! You must be thinking, erm ok it's the wife's duty to take care of hubby's everyday's needs, health & meals; what else? Well.. you must to learn to be accomodating, compromising and understanding not only to hubby but also your in-laws (most of the times applicable to mother-in-law). So you're taking into considerations more than 2 person's feelings & needs! There's this phrase - marriage is never just about two person; this is so true!

I must admit I'm not those very mild-tempered, patient, sensible lady... but I've learn to be one, well still learning it everyday because circumstances forces me to, if not all hell will break loose .. long ago! Haha. I am someone who yearns for independence and freedom because I was brought up in such way. My mum has never really interfere in my decisions and actions, perhaps that explains my independency too.. Ah hah, one important factor - she never nags for long. Haha

Initially shifted to stay together with my hubby at his mother's place after he came back from his 4 months sailing to catch up times. At the very beginning, my hubby already asked if I want to shift in while waiting for our new house renovation completion but I didn't agree immediately. Of course I would love to see him everyday esp from his long absence but I knew things ain't gonna easy staying in other people's house. No matter what, it's never your own house and each individuals have different housekeeping and habits.

Moereever I won't want to stir up any unnecessary troubles or unhappiness for that short 2 months. But it did happened. Haha. That's why I'm here writtting all these.

Actually marriage is a very beautiful thing in life (that every living soul should experience) .. but with obstacles/bumps added to make it more meaningful...

A world of possibilities awaits you.
Keep turning the page...

What's your definition of true love?
Does true love really do exists?
Have you found yours?


I have never believe in true love; it's only made possible in movie scripts. I remembered one of my gd friend telling me that there's no such thing as "Everlasting Love" which I truly agrees with him. There's only everlasting commitment & responsibility, because commitment= love+compromising+tolerance. I think as time goes by, it would be :


Together for 1 yr : 80% Love 10% Compromise 10% Tolerance


Together for 3 yrs : 60% Love 25% Compromise 15% Tolerance


Married for 1 yr : 50% Love 25% Compromise 25% Tolerance


Married for 3 yrs : 30% Love 35% Compromise 35% Tolerance


Married for 10yrs: 10% Love 40% Compromise 50% Tolerance


When would you think it's the right time to settle down? How would you define the Right Time??
When both have been together for donkey years? When you thought both understands each other well enough? When your parents start to pressurize you on it? When you feel it's time to move on to a new phrase in life?


Marriage is never about being the right time; it's a decision. It will never be happily ever after, you have to make it works. Alot of times people thinks it's time to move on, building up your own family but when they are in the process itself then they realised it's not easy because all surfaces as you move further. Many would give up after trying hard to make the marriage works. But how hard have you tried? Have you thought of giving up when you signed the marriage certificate?


Happiness will not always be there, so why not make it be there. Decision you made is for life so make it work for life. It's never easy to find someone you can spend the rest of life with, so why not find someone you want to spend your life with. The want might be the motivation push for you.


As I was writting this post, a sudden thought came into my mind - so what made my hubby decided about marriage? Am I the can or the want?


I wonders.....

We were there, were u there?
Never ever thought our next meet up will be the final one..
Never thought it'll be under such circumstances...


I kept looking at your photo, kept asking myself - Why? Why you?
Sorry that I didn't look at you for long, but you know how much I wanted to. I can't. Tears tickled down, and I walked away.



We were all talking about the fun times we had with you @ I2, EQ. Your favourite sentence "What's for lunch?" but now no more of that at all.


No more HANS sandwiches or your english breakfast set..
No more economical bee hoon..
No more Nasi Padang whenever we feel rich at month end..
No more tea sessions..
But I always will have you in my heart


At least I'm glad you've seen my ROM photos even though you didn't manage to attend (you were in HK). I know you're truly happy for me, because all along we both wanted each other to be happy & blessed.


No last chance to say my goodbye.. because I never thought I have to.


Felicia Ho Mei Leng... I know you're blessed in God's hands now.


with greatest love, i signed off

It was about 4 years back when we first met. My very first day @ Infinity2, sitting at my allocated table reading through some relevant introductory brochures of the company with Jacq. You, the finance manager walked in solemnly, didn't even glanced at me nor acknowledged my pressence. I concluded you'll be one hard-ass to get along then.


During the pioneer year, it's only Jac, Alana, Digby, you and me @ Greatwood building, Carpenter St building up the team. It was amazing how we both got along so well gradually, you're one jolly jovious being! Digby was often bullied, ignored by you and Jac, I'll always be the one to entertain him be'cos I'm the new bird, but slowly got influenced & join in the club! =)


When Jac left the company, we two became even closer. Tea-si-kosong is a definite order every morning when you're @ Infinity2, always can't wait to start our gossip session, still remember how many times Digby found us inside the pantry yanking away?? I already lost count!! "It's not gossiping, it's caring" remember ?


Oh boy, when Holly joined, it was so much fun. It feels good to go to work everyday though the shift timing sucks big time, but it was fun having you around. You always dislike being disturbed by distributors when you're in office and often got to cook up good reasons for you. When Gloria & Sebas joined, we knew they're not able to camoflage into our team and we were right. It doesn't take long for everyone to dislike Gloria's working style and Sebas's way of dealing with leaders, esp ME.


You always am there for us, showing me the support we needed. Fighting for our rights and what we ought to deserve.


Do you still remember our chats? Do you still remember our times?


From Infinity2 to EQ, from Carpenter st to Robinson rd, from strangers to close-frd, all these are unforgettable! Many times when I just wanted to end it all, tendered in my resignation, it was because of you, I held back. Silly? Perhaps. But I never once regretted my decision about that. It's only last year when I decided to move on, at least Yvel will be there to help you.


I missed those times. Do you miss it too? Will you remember it?
Will you remember us ?


I will always remember you, Felicia.


You were more than just a colleague, close friend to me. We shared too many things, your departure is just too unexpectedly sudden. Thought we promise to meet up when you're better? Thought you're recovering? Why?
Maybe I should feel more relieved and happy for you instead, at least you're being taken away from your pain.


You often told me that God knows what's best for you, he'll give you the answers. Felicia, this is the answer.


You'll always be remembered.


Rest in peace, my dearest sister.

: 12 July 2006 :